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Why do you want the things you want?

Victoria Beckham for Target Orange Romper with Kate Spade Purse, Tan Raffia Heels and BaubleBar EarringsSam & Libby Esther Heeled Sandals from Target Victoria Beckham for Target Orange Romper with Kate Spade Purse, Tan Raffia Heels and BaubleBar EarringsVictoria Beckham for Target Orange Romper with Kate Spade Purse, Tan Raffia Heels and BaubleBar EarringsVictoria Beckham for Target Orange Romper with Kate Spade Purse, Tan Raffia Heels and BaubleBar Earrings Sam & Libby Esther Heeled Sandals from Target Victoria Beckham for Target Orange Romper with Kate Spade Purse, Tan Raffia Heels and BaubleBar Earrings

Is it because you think you’ll be happier if you have it?

Is it because your family thinks you need it?

Is it because your friends all have it?

This can apply to things as trivial as choosing a lipstick color and as serious as having a child.

Are you truly ready to get engaged or do you want to because your Facebook feed is blowing up with shiny new rings?

Are you going to graduate school because your parents want you to or because you actually want to your Ph.D.?

Do you actually want that designer bag or do you just think it will make you happier?

Now, more than ever, it is way too easy to fall into this trap. With the prominence of social media we feel the need to share everything  (I’ll admit, I’m guilty as well. Hell, I have this blog where I publicly share my thoughts on the internet.) Because of this it is oftentimes easier to just want what everyone else does. All these people on Instagram look really happy – maybe if I get a goldendoodle, a Louis Vuitton and some Starbucks I will be too?

(typical blogger example but you get my point).

As of late I’ve been feeling this immense pressure to do more, be more, figure out a plan, make decisions, focus on a career, the list goes on. But, what I realized, is that I was putting this pressure on myself due to what I THINK people want me to do.

Pretty convoluted, right?

(And yes, my parents would probably prefer it if I were a little more “career focused.”)

So,

I’ve been trying to focus on what I actually want. JUST ME. Not what my friends want, not what my parents want, not what *society* says I should want, but what I want. It can be overwhelming, so I keep a note in my phone and periodically jot down ideas for jobs, careers that peak my interest, the things I do daily that bring me joy, and things people think I’m good at/come to me for help.

For example (in relation to careers): I know I love teaching SPIN, I know I love helping people find their style and feel confident in their clothes and I know I love writing (to name a few). Now that I’ve identified things I know I love, I’m in the process of turning those things into financially beneficial situations for myself (aka I get paid to do what I love).

My main point here is to ask yourself the (sometimes hard) question: do I really want this?

And if so, why do I want this?

 Does it help me reach my goals?

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Whew, that was a bit of a doozy for a Monday, but I’ve had this on my mind all weekend. Hopefully some of you can relate!

A quick note: this romper is from the Victoria Beckham for Target collection and is SO cute. My sandals and romper are linked below and neither is more than $35.

Thanks for reading today – I would love to know your thoughts on this post!
share in the comments below 🙂

xo, Maddy

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10 Comments

  • Reply Kendall

    I can so relate to this feeling! Thanks so much for sharing – I love following your blog!

    April 24, 2017 at 5:24 pm
  • Reply Nikki

    It can be so hard to figure out what you really want. I am 30, and I don’t know. Also, it doesn’t help that it constantly changes (at least for me).

    That romper is too cute on you! I went to Target the weekend the VB collection came out and I wanted it. And then I saw it this past weekend and I still want it. I sadly just won’t get much wear out of it.

    Nikki
    thefashionablewife.com

    April 24, 2017 at 5:37 pm
  • Reply Anna White

    What a great post! Love how you share real thoughts and real life “stuff.” XO –

    Anna | http://www.parkavenueblogger.com

    April 24, 2017 at 8:05 pm
  • Reply Amy

    Everything about this outfit is so fun and pretty! I love how colorful and bold the colors are. That romper looks so good on you. =)

    ❤️ http://www.TheBlushingPink.com

    April 24, 2017 at 8:41 pm
  • Reply Jessie @ Just Jessie

    Love, love, love this post. And that romper … cute! I’ve never been an orange girl, but maybe I could change my mind …

    I’m totally with you on all of this stuff and I fall into it quite often. I struggle especially with wanting to look like someone (fitness-wise) or wanting a really nice apartment (even though I’m never home …) or wanting pretty shoes (even though in the summer I’m pretty much barefoot unless I’m at work …) It’s hard not to be pressured, ESPECIALLY in today’s society with social media.

    April 24, 2017 at 9:14 pm
  • Reply Laura

    This is such a cute look! That scallop detail is beautiful!
    xx
    Laura
    http://www.sequinsatbreakfast.com

    April 24, 2017 at 9:45 pm
  • Reply Caitlin | Beauty & Colour

    Great read and those DV shoes are AMAZING!

    Caitlin, Beauty & Colour

    April 25, 2017 at 3:20 am
  • Reply Jessica

    That is a vibrant color on that romper! But I love how you dressed around it!

    Jessica | notjessfashion.com

    April 25, 2017 at 6:53 am
  • Reply Amy

    And here I was just wanting to look at a cute outfit and you are making me THINK and asses my whole life. LOL! But seriously, such a good topic. It is important to question our motives. Often I think I want things because I think they will make me happy or because I think I need them to fit in which just isn’t true. On a fashion related note, you look gorgeous!!

    Amy Ann
    Straight A Style

    April 25, 2017 at 1:12 pm
  • Reply Laura @ Walking in Memphis in High Heels

    So true, sometimes it is hard to separate what we want and what we think we want. Love your romper!

    April 25, 2017 at 2:19 pm
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